Living By Revelation

All sane, reasonable people live by revelation. They may not think it, but they do. Whether it is the revelation of the mundane (for example, what day you wash clothes and in what order - dark or light clothes first) to the not-so-mundane (for example, your religion or reasons for not having a religion at all).

The whole spectrum of our lives between these two are the silent revelations by which we live and they define us. But there are two types of people who don't get the most out of life because of a diseased and blocked revelation.

The first is the person who doesn't have a revelation at all and acts on purely animal instincts. These are the Don't Care or Whatever generation who would sooner smash up a bus stop that think about what it is that makes them want to smash up the bus stop. If they have any revelation, it's that it's best not to have a revelation since they see people who care about things as uncool, unchilled and old fashioned.

The other kind faces a different kind of destruction. Whereas the first kind has never really had a revelation (thus a personality) to destroy apart from that which they themselves have destroyed, this second is struggling to find a revelation but cannot because they are constantly having someone else's revelation put onto and into them.

When this second kind of person gets up in the morning, they have to try and live their life in the way that they imagine someone else would want them to live it. They will have breakfast in breakfast bowls and tea in the cups designated for tea but if they have visitors, they must use different cups. These people are as empty as the first type, but for them the emptiness is despite their efforts. These people are dead and have no avenue or means to express the person they are.

The common ground between these two types is that they are allowing themselves to be crushed under the pressure of something or someone that wants to wipe them out. If you don't stand for something, you'll fall for anything and if you allow yourself to live by someone else's values, then when that person is absent or has departed, you will be as good as dead yourself because you allowed your soul to be wrapped up in them.

Revelation is something by which you know yourself and know others. There's no shame in knowing yourself, you have to know who you are, what you are, what you like and what you don't like. You will have been influenced and shaped by situation, parents, grandparents, siblings, teachers and friends but at the end of the day, you must call the shots. If you want to drink hot tea out of a glass then go ahead and do that.

A person's revelation can change, but it must change from inside. You can't allow yourself to go through a 'forced conversion' to please someone else and expect to be alive in your own heart and mind. You're going to destroy yourself and fail to be anything or anyone (and when I say 'fail to be anything', I'm not talking about getting rich and powerful, I'm talking about being a whole person). You can't start going to church and doing the 'church' thing and expect to become a Christian for the acts, the change comes inside. Likewise, you can't be expected to become an atheist just because someone told you that your experience is nonsense and you must abandon it. If you abandon your faith, it must be an abandonment from within else it's not real and you are only allowing someone else to govern your body and put another layer of complexity onto your mind.

Simplicity dictates that you can only live by your own revelation and if you allow anybody to try and change or destroy that revelation, then it is up to you to stand your ground and live, or cave in and die trying to please others.

Don't be afraid to say no to something or someone, especially if they're trying to control you.

Welcome To The Happy, Clappy Freak Show

Greetings from the annual international conference of the Apostolic Church (ablazeUK) where important issues will be addressed, issues like; Where's Terry? Does Terry want a seat kept for him? Wouldn't it be a travesty of natural justice if Terry was sitting on his own? Has Terry got his trendy T-Shirt?

Actually, the difficult truths I'm discovering are that all old people look the same, there doesn't appear to be a maximum amount of makup that women can get to stick to their faces and if you don't sing, you're out.

On top of that, there are those who were once introduced to me some ten years ago who feel they know me well enough to ask me inappropriately personal questions about my sex life (or apparent lack thereof).

So, that and the prammed couples with their trendy offspring, rich couples with their nice cars and the defeated couples who are looking for a reason to stay together makes this the last place for any single, lonely person.

But, above the declarations and veiled spiritual willy-waving, there is a high purpose which is in danger of being missed in the spin and bussle. This purpose, as far as the people who are here are concerned, is in the hands of those who through courage, faith or ignorance, have accepted the difficult task of leading the church into spreading the Good News of the love of God through Jesus.

You see, what I've had to learn and am still learning is that Christianity is full ol human beings who are as prone to the primal urges of protectionism, elitism and narrow-vision as everybody else and that the goal is not for me to become liked but known by God. Is it right for it to be this way? That's why I feel sorry for the leaders who are sailing the last ship of hope through an ever darkening and disintegrating society. In a world where tha gap between those who have plenty and those who have nothing is widening in galactic proportions, who's going to give the message that there is another way, a means to escape the corruption?

Common sense says it won't be the coupled morons here in this tent, but it wouldn't be the first time God has taken a bunch of simpletons and used them to change the world.

Injustice and sorrow are safe as long as the people who 'have' the justice and the joy keep it safe from the ugly and the stupid and those who are crying out for them without knowing it.

The Decline Of Religion

I once again tuned my radio to Marcus Brigstocke's mouth and this time he extolled the virtues of humanity, expressing confidence in the power of humanity to do excellent things.

As we see religion loose its evil-gotten grip on society and government, I'm glad to be able to look out on a safe world, run by hones-to-human people My gran can feel safe to go out after dark and our children are all safe.

I haven't seen a beaten-up bus stop in hours.

Isn't humanity just fantastic? As religion declines, we see everything else get better. Darn Christians eh? Always holding things back. I think I'm going to weep tears of joy. Hang on, they're coming...

Jacek on the Prowl

I like reading the Mobile Phone Fan blog because I think it is an ironic parody of the stereotypical angry geek, but I stopped commenting there a few years ago when I started getting personal threats against me and my family/friends.

I see, rather worryingly, that he has started obsessing over Swansea in the belief that someone from there is pretending to work for Microsoft or something. I don't live in Swansea any more, but I am genuinely worried that he thinks its me and when he won't be able to find me there will start hounding my family and friends who do live there.

I don't know if I should alert the authorities to this proven dangerous character from Poland or just hope that he finds his victim and leaves me alone.

It's a shame, his blog is normally so entertaining but knowing what an obsessively paranoid person he is, I can't help thinking I could be his next victim.

Jacek, take the tablets. They're for your good, honest!

Still No Landline

BT still haven't got me connected. I'm still on hold for hours. Nobody seems to know what's going on. I'm paying for the service.

Just How Much Does BT Suck?

Today, I decided to set about the task of working out how much BT sucks.

It's somewhere between 'helluva lot' and 'more than a big sucky thing that has more suck than an overenthusiastic vacuum cleaner who thiniks he's about to be made redundant by his boss on whom it has a man-crush'.

Last week, I asked BT to give me a telephone service in return for some money. Unfortunately, while they understand perfectly well the concept of money, they don't appear to grasp the essentials of service. In fact, trying to get BT to activate my landline is harder than registering a Freedom Input Bluetooth Keyboard (oh, the irony that Bluetooth is often written 'BT')!

BT told me last week that it weould take a week but it would be active by Monday... Today.

It's not.

They sent me a text telling me to call them if it is not active by 19:00. I did but gave up after an hour of being told that my call is important and that they always have a lot of calls on a Monday so I may want to call back Tuesday.

(Here's a radical idea; if you know you always get a lot of calls on a Monday, get more staff in on a Monday. I know, crazy idea eh? I must be so whacky or something!)

After waiting an hour, I thought 'stuff this' and went for a walk. I was fed up using my free minutes trying to get hold of a telephone company that considers itself to be 'world class'.

I went for a walk and tried a public phone box. I waited and waited and decided to just leave it there, on hold. When someone finally does respond, they'll get as much sense as I have.

I'm not asking anyone to put a rocket into space, just to get my phone working without turning it into a bitter blog entry.

As it is, anybody who tries to phone me will get an Engaged tone. Nice.

Maybe it's a Welsh thing, that Welsh telecomms engineers don't know what telephones do and that the irritating 'brrrrrrr' sound that was coming down the line before was a sign that something was wrong so he 'made it better' by cutting the nasty cable.

Do I sound bitter? I've only waited a week for something that should take a few minutes. I've only agreed to pay for something I'm not getting. I'm only depending on a medium of communication that's as reliable as an elephant's needle threading skills.

I don't know what potty-brained moron decided that winding up the ciustomers like this is a good idea, but whoever it is, I hope their nose falls off and that they wear glasses.

The Law Without Grace

I heard on Radio 4 this morning of the desperate situation many people found themselves in during the massive floods that have hit the UK in recent days.

Many families have been stranded in their cars overnight with some reversing up motorway hard shoulders in order to get somewhere safer.

It's these that I want to comment on because the police have said that those who reversed up a Hard Shoulder could face prosecution.

I think that it is a disgrace that prosecution is even being considered. These are not normal circumstances and so the law should consider that. The law is made for the people, not people for the law (guess Who I'm paraphrasing there) and as such, people who would not normally do something as stupid as reversing up a Hard Shoulder should be shown grace.

If they do it on a lovely day and cause trouble for free-flowing traffic then by all means, throw the book at them. But when they are worried about the safety of their loved ones or little ones then please, cut them some slack!

Harry Potter Pottiness - Prorities at ChildLine?

I read on the BBC website about how staff who work for ChildLine are being asked to work extra hours to offer help to children upset at the death of two characters in the latest Harry Potter novel.

I'm sorry, but ChildLine is for children who are being abused, threatened and pushed to areas beyond their years. Dealing with fictional characters' demise is what parents are for, parents who teach their kids to get their act together and get on with life.

What kind of soft society have we become? I remember Elsie Tanner dying in Coronation Street and being shocked at people begging ITV not to let her die. I remember being amazed at people leaving flowers where Victor Meldrew supposedly died.

These people are fictional. They're not real. They're not an uncle, aunt, cousin, parent, grandparent or best friend (the death of any of which is traumatic). Any kids calling ChildLine because someone has died in a Harry Potter book need to be told to get over it and make room for someone who really needs help.

No TV, Thank You

Since moving, I've come across people looking at me like I have three heads as they exclaim, "You don't have a telly!?"

Don't get me wrong, there are TV shows I love (like Doctor Who and, ermm, Doctor Who) so I'm not trying to make a religious 'I am more righteous than you' statement, I just want to try and live a simple life and cutting out wasteful source of 'noise' can only be a good thing and anything I really want to watch can wait until it comes out on DVD.

I must admit to coming home and wishing, from time to time, that I had a telly, but once I put on some music I start to relax in a way that feels oddly deeper and more fulfilling than when in front of a telly.

Think about those hours that human evolution has brought us to, hours of switching off our brains as crap pours into them from the glowing boxes in the corners of our living rooms. Is that a good thing?

When I want news, entertainment, music or anything, I can listen to the radio or pocasts while doing something else, or I can interact with content of my choosing on the internet. By reducing the number of channels through which rubbish can travel, I can cut the amount of rabbish and make fuller use of the channels I am keeping open.

All I want is a simple life.

:-)

Don't let it settle

I'm reading in my Google News that the Welsh assembly is approving the merger of various NHS trusts.

What strikes me as stupid in health, education and other areas of government is the need to not allow anything time to work.

I really want to know what these people think they're doing and what their real objective is because it certainly is not to improve things.

If they really wanted to make things better, they wouldn't be bending over backwards trying to find the best way to annoy as many people as possible. They wouldn't be trying to keep everyone confused with a constant barrage of new initiatives and ideas and procedures without allowing time to see if the old ways sucked.

My questions are simple and few;

What do they think they're doing?

Unreliable Media

So the Queen didn't storm out, so why was the impression given that she did?

Shambo, the sacred West Wales cow with TB has been rescued from slaughter thanks to media attention highlighting how evil it would be to kill it. Thanks now to the media, I know how two-faced the 'authorities' are because there's a bunch of angry farmers who think that it is unfair that their cattle are slaughtered while Shambo lives.

Deliberate antagonism?

Who's right? What's the real story?

As more and more children of the 70s and 80s move up the career ladders of various media companies, we can expect more hype and less truth as people seek to convey their message as opposed to what has happened or is happening

I See why you say that

I heard a put-down on the radio tonight, one spoken by a government Minister. It went something like this

"Your opinion is so full of Conspiracy Theories, it would shame a juvenile anorak"

The problem is that it is highly unlikely that a political party would ever adopt the kind of position that a juvenile anorak would take.

What she effectively told me as I listened to her, was that she is unable to comprehend an opinion apart from hers.

Why can't people be polite and say "I understand why you think that, but I believe you are wrong and this is why..."?

I meet people every day who would rather insult someone for being different and wrong rather than actually understand what is being said, why it is being said and what can be learned from it.

The Conflict (Repost - Originally Posted July 7, 2007)

So, your neighbor likes to throw stones at your kids when they're in the garden. Your neighbor won't listen when you ask or tell him to stop, he just keeps throwing stones. He's even started throwing them through your windows and your kids are to afraid to even move because wherever they go, stones are landing on their heads.

You try and call the police, but they won't help. You ask your other neighbors for help only to find out they're supplying stones to this one neighbor who's doing the throwing because they don't want you there.

What do you do?

By the way, any stones you throw back may hit your neighbor's kids and if they do, all the street will call you a murderer and the one neighbor who was on your side has started to come under pressure because you dared throw stones back and you hurt someone.

The stones keep coming in and your children keep getting hurt.

You build a higher wall so the stones can't get in, but then the street complains that you're trying to cut off natural light from your poor neighbor who you are victimizing. So, you promise to stop throwing stones if your neighbor does, the neighbor agrees, you stop throwing stones then the neighbor starts throwing stones again.

Why is your neighbor throwing stones at your kids? Because he wants your house. He says it was his before you moved in (it was originally yours anyway), but it never was his - he was squatting there while the house was owned by someone else. You moved in and tried to make friends, and the very next day all your neighbors (who's house, although 'next door', is actually part of yours) started throwing stones at you.

So, the whole street is against you, the village is turning against you, your neighbor is still throwing stones at your kids, others in the street are giving stones to your neighbor to throw stones at your kids, the police won't help, you're not allowed to throw stones back, you're not allowed to build a bigger wall and if you try and make friends, the neighbor's kids start throwing stones at each other and the street blames you.

Any ideas?

The problem with the above is that there's no clear route because if you believe that someone is in your house, you will want to evict them. if you believe that you are in your house and someone is trying to evict you, you will try and stop them.

I know it's not a clear cut situation and I have often watched the news and thought "what on earth does Israel think it's doing!?', but I'm worried by the new liberalism that is gaining more and more ground in the West which is turning people into anti-Israeli bigots, expecting that Israel should not defend itself and failing to understand that Israel has not one friend in the Middle East.

Israel needs to change many of its ways, I know, but trying to wipe Israel off the map - whether by Iranian-led force or limp European liberalism - is not the answer and it certainly isn't right.

The Modern Christian Leader

I'm having a bit of a 'downer' on religion at the moment, which is a bit of a problem when you're a Born Again Christian but I can't help it.

What's bugging me at the moment is watching what happens with your typical modern Christian Leader or Pastor. Not all pastors are the same (mine is a particularly nice, honest, reliable, open and trustworthy chap - and I mean that), but there is a trend that I have observed, in particular with those who are pastors of larger churches, and that trend is very ugly.

I'm not even going to elaborate on their big cars and fitted suits, but I am going to comment on their distance from the world which the rest of us inhabits. Their distance is a problem on two levels.

The first problem is that, as far as bringing in non-Christians is concerned, they seem to think that everyone is a Big Brother watching lager lout or a Radio 4 listening agnostic who's desparate to be rescued from a life of jam making.

They focus on the Big Brother generation and assume that everybody is too thick to see through the shallow multimedia which they pump out. The assumption is that Radio 4 Jam Makers have had their chance so they can find their own way (if they make their own way at all) and we have to get more and more 'young people' and to get 'young people' to come to church, we've got act as stupid as the kids who hang around the bus stop drinking alco-pops in your town or village; loud music with words so generic they could be singing about Jesus or a Zebra, sermons that say everything is Ok and there's no need to go to church but it would be nice if you did, and names for 'young people' gatherings like 'The Lazer Group', 'Nuclear Kidz', 'Atomic Purpose Finders' or 'The iGod' (basically, anything that doesn't let on that someone may mention 'Jesus' in a 'nice' way).

The second is the aloofness of the leaders' own position and unapproachability which is felt by those who go to church but aren't in the 'Worship Group', who don't dress according to their age (torn jeans and T-Shirt if you're under 30, trousers and tie for 30+), who may be a little bit ugly (after all, they want churches to be attractive so there's no room for buck-toothed fatties), who may want something a little deeper than a Sunday Night Pep Talk or who may actually be tired after doing a whole day in what we 'non church leaders' call a 'day job'.

I'm trying to hold myself back because I know I'm winding myself up, but it drives me up the wall when they come down on the older church members for not attending the conventions or the 'leadership seminars' or even the special visits by passing dignitaries. They want you to give them your money, your time, your energy. You may be struggling to keep your eyes open at the end of the day, you may be ready to scream and collapse under the stress of work, you may be struggling to have a bank balance at the end of your financial month, but that's your problem and you should have more faith to believe so that you too could have a big 2ltr car, a house, a sofa and a shagpile carpet.

In a single sentence, they have the power to control your actions, will and identity. You may have thought that you were a good chap whom God loves but they have the power to tell you that you don't have a future and that you suck. They 'know' you better than you do and so they explain your own motives to you (in case you didn't know). They give you the criteria of success and laugh snotty chortles when they have their 'lodge meetings' because you're so dumb. If you're not one of 'theirs', you can go away forever and they won't care, but if you are 'theirs', then if you vanish for half an hour, there'll be 'prayer marches' around your house and and all-night vigils because you're such a nice person and Jesus loves you because you're special, pretty and you can play the piano.

These things have not happened to me, I've not been treated like this but I have seen others be treated like this and it gets me in the gut. I believe with all my heart in Jesus and that He is the 'image' and 'essence' of God, and I also know that the Church is, like ever other organisation, structured with a hierarchy and organisation that makes sense, but I wonder if these people who make their proclamations, walk around with their big zipped-up Bibles and beautiful wives realise that their kingdoms are shrinking.

The growing churches have humble leaders who don't demand what they won't give and who don't demand what the people can't give. Churches that matter have people who know they matter (no matter their ability, appearance or financial stability) and these churches preach sermons that matter.

I am impressed when I see a pastor who drives a normal car (ie, a car that would have £15,000 knocked off the value if you snotted on the leather upholstery), who smiles at people who smell and talks to people who society considers beyond their 'best by' date. I respect pastors who challenge my lifestyle by their lifestyle, I don't respect pastors who want everybody to be money-grabbing number crunchers, who have nothing to offer society apart from the things that society has got anyway.

iPhone: Is it Ok?

I've been watching the hype that's surrounding the iPhone and experiencing some mixed feelings. I think I can sum these feelings up in three paragraphs;

1. It's Great
Looking at videos of the device and believing the reviewers when they say that it performs exactly as it does in the advertisements, I have to say that this is one classy device. It has indeed taken the mobile phone User Interface by storm and has shown people (and phone manufacturers) what can be done if you just put in a little effort. It's sexy, versatile and extremely desirable.

2. It's Nothing New
Coupled with silly initial limitations (such as being unable to use your iTunes tracks as ringtones), this phone doesn't actually offer anything new outside of the GUI. The internet, e-mail, chat and other facilities are old news to anybody who's been using Smartphones for years already. What Apple has actually managed to do is not take the world by storm with a fantastic new technology, but rather, with fantastic marketing. Honestly, to do all the iPhone can do, you don't need an iPhone.

3. What Have We Become?
Teens were spending their last dollars in savings, people were queuing for days to get to the store first and trying to buy their way forward and in the meantime, everyone was salivating over each and every tidbit of information that Apple released in the build-up to the release. I was amazed at how many people were buying more than one because 'it's the iPhone'. This mobile phone has changed people's lives (at least, their perception for the short term) and if that is the case, I think my question is very important; what have we become?

I'm not saying it's wrong, I'm just asking if it's Ok to spend thousands of dollars to buy a phone to play with, a phone to use in work and a phone to open up? Is it Ok to get as excited over online photos of an unboxing? Is it Ok to allow ourselves to bolster our sense of self worth because we've got something we're told is the next big thing? Is it Ok to consider someone as ever-so-slightly lower in class than us because they can't afford what we've got?

I'll say it again, I'm not saying it's wrong, but I want to ask if it's Ok to flash the fruits of personal wealth when that encourages covetousness, feelings of inadequacy, jealousy and maybe even lust?

And that's not even mentioning the 'haters' who are as strong against the iPhone as the fans are for it.

Such a broad spectrum of human frailty and fickleness seems to have manifested itself with the release of what is, really, just another phone. The fact that we can get so excited about something that doesn't save life or even make life more bearable tells me that maybe, what we've become (some may say 'evolved into') is really rather ugly.

Freedom Universal Keyboard Drivers

Sometimes, I come across a company and a product that is so brilliant in concept yet so ineptly executed that I wonder who on earth could have authorised the policy to 'annoy our users to the verge of rage'.

One such company is Freedom Input who have a range of half-decent mobile keyboards. The problem comes when you try and use a keyboard for the first time. Downloading and installing the drivers is a little tedious, but that is not the problem.

The problem comes when you have to activate the drivers in a way that makes WindowsXP and Vista look positively friendly. You see, on the back of your paper manual (you didn't throw that away now did you?) is a unique code for your device. That, along with another unique code which appears on the device's screen must be entered into the Freedom Input website and then you wait for a code which will activate the drivers on your device.

That is a pain. What's more of a pain is when you're told by the website that your codes are invalid and you have to raise a support ticket. In my case, I was four days with a dead bluetooth keyboard before I got a response and now that I have yet another PocketPC to play with, I am annoyed that I may have to wait another four days before I can use the keyboard on that.

Being so long without the use of a product that cost the best part of £60 is a little annoying, to say the least.

They argue on their forums that the reason for this hoop jumping just to use a keyboard is that other manufacturers are trying to steal their software to power their keyboards. While I can understand that it can be annoying to have someone steal your software, I'd argue that first of all, I bought the keyboard for the keyboard and not the pretty software and second, there's this thing called 'law' which would bring any thieves to account if they decided to do some driver-pilfering.

In my opinion, their argument is weak and it still looks like they are deliberately trying to make things as complicated as possible for their customers. I, for one, would not have bought this keyboard if I'd known about this hassle and the next time I buy a product, I will do proper research even into the kind of things that I would take for granted on other platforms.

On the whole, it;s a nice keyboard - it's just a shame there's so much hassle in trying to get it to work.

Update
Sheesh, I'm only three posts into my new blog and I'm already having to correct myself. While the full-on drivers do have to be unlocked, the keyboard can actually operate using the generic built in drivers found in many mobile devices.

While I would argue that the manufacturer should at least mention this and not force me to go Googling, I was wrong and so this is my correction. I won't call it an apology though but that's because I'm too pig-headed ;-)

Tecstio - Text Messaging in Welsh on Your Mobile

I was sent a link to Tecstio, a website that offers a mobile Java tool which allows you to send text message using predictive text input in Welsh! It really is so cool!

Not only does it do proper predictive text in Welsh, it accounts for punctuation and automatically accents letters where necessary!

It works fine on my Nokia n73 and I suspect it'll work on pretty much any modern mobile phone, whether a so-called 'Smart' phone or otherwise.

I'm back...

I want to blog. It helps me vent my spleen and, in the days of TANKERx - Thoughts, Meditations & Brain Dumps, I even got some mail and comments thanking me for the help (not millions, not even hundreds of thousands, and no not thousands and, pity really, not even hundreds), so I guessed I'd set my feet back on the blogger's trail and talk about the things that vex, help, amuse, thrill, delight, sadden and tickle me.

So, expect some tech catchup and who knows where we'll end up :-)